In the world of health and fitness, we are constantly receiving messages on how to eat, move, and even breathe well in order to look after ourselves. But when is the last time you heard someone get excited about bone health? 

Exactly. It’s not sexy. It doesn’t trend on Instagram. No one’s complimenting you on your femur density. But here’s the thing: your skeleton is literally holding you up. And if you’re a woman over 40, your bones are quietly asking for your attention – maybe even screaming for it.

Let’s answer the call. Because what’s at stake isn’t just your posture – it’s your power, your independence, and your ability to keep doing the things you love (like chasing grandkids, playing fetch with your dog, or hiking up Te Mata Peak in your seventies).

So… what actually happens to our bones over time?

Bones aren’t bricks – they’re alive. They are constantly breaking down and rebuilding themselves in a dance called bone turnover. Up until about age 30, we’re crushing it: building more than we lose. But after that? The rebuild crew starts slacking off.

Enter menopause – the great hormonal plot twist. Oestrogen, which helps protect bones, drops like a stone. And when it does, bone breakdown speeds up. On average, women lose up to 20% of their bone density in the 5-7 years after menopause. It’s like a flash sale on structural integrity – but nobody told us.

The stats you didn’t know you needed

• 1 in 2 women over 50 will break a bone due to osteoporosis.

• For men? It’s 1 in 5 (because of course it is).

• Women are four times more likely to develop osteoporosis.

• And after a hip fracture, approximately 1 in 4 women over 50 die within a year (yes, I’m being dramatic – but also, this is real).

Despite these stats, bone health is rarely part of routine healthcare until a break happens – which is like checking the smoke alarm after the fire’s already started.

Why aren’t we talking about this?

Part of the issue? Bone loss is invisible. You don’t feel your spine getting less dense. There’s no “bone fatigue” or flashing warning light. You just get on with life – until something gives way, usually a wrist, a hip, or your lower back.

The other part? Medicine has long been male-first. Much of what we know about health is based on studies done on men – and that includes bones. But men don’t go through menopause. They don’t lose bone at the same rate. They’re not the ones silently shattering vertebrae reaching for a cereal box.

In short: this is a women’s health issue that hasn’t had the spotlight it deserves. Let’s fix that. 

The best medicine isn’t in a bottle – it’s in a barbell 

If you want to keep your bones strong, your first stop isn’t calcium tablets or a holiday in the sun. It’s the weights area at the gym. Because bones respond to load. The more force you put through them (in a smart, progressive way), the more they go: “Oh, we’d better toughen up!” 

Strength training stimulates bone growth (hello, osteoblasts). It improves muscle mass, which also supports bone and helps with balance. It even reduces falls, because you’re literally more stable. It’s basically the opposite of that “fragile flower” nonsense midlife women have been fed. 

And here’s the best part: you don’t have to be athletic. You just have to start. Bodyweight squats. Resistance bands. Deadlifts. Lunges. It all adds up (and yes, you’re allowed to grunt a little – it’s part of the charm). 

Food for Thought – and Bone 

You can’t build a house without bricks, and you can’t build bone without fuel. Here’s what your skeleton’s hungry for: 

• Calcium – This is much better when obtained through food than supplements. Think leafy greens, tofu, sardines (with bones!), dairy, and fortified plant milks. 

• Vitamin D – Luckily we are spoilt for sunshine in Hawke’s Bay, but even here supplementation can be helpful (especially in winter). 

• Protein – A biggie. Bones are 50% protein by volume, and many women don’t get enough. Aim for 1.2–1.5g per kg of body weight per day. Don’t forget plant-based options (beans, nuts, broccoli, soy) alongside meat and dairy. 

And please – don’t starve yourself for “health”. Chronic dieting, a low-calorie focus, or cutting entire food groups will only rob your bones blind. 

A pep talk for midlife women 

Look, we’ve been sold some dodgy messaging over the years. Be smaller. Weigh less. Take up less space. But here’s the reality: being small increases your risk of bone loss. The lighter you are, the less load your bones carry. The less load, the weaker they become. 

It’s time to flip the script. Let’s stop shrinking and start strengthening. Because strong is not just about how much you can lift – it’s about how long you can live well.

Kathryn’s story: Reversing osteoporosis at 80

When 80-year-old Kathryn Young was first diagnosed with osteoporosis nearly two decades ago, she wasn’t surprised. “I fit all the risk criteria – white, small, thin-boned – and my mother had it too,” she says. “She suffered a bad fall and fractured her hip, which never fully healed. I didn’t want the same outcome.”

For years, she followed her doctor’s advice and took medication (Fosamax), which helped slow bone loss but didn’t significantly improve her bone density. That changed when she took a chance on strength training.

“I wasn’t aiming to reverse osteoporosis,” she explains. “I was more focused on keeping strong and mobile. Honestly, I just wanted to open jars more easily!” 

“Not only have I built muscle and energy, but a recent DEXA scan showed tangible improvements in my hips and spine. I’ve now moved out of the osteoporosis range, and off Fosamax. I’m drug free – and I credit strength training for it.”

Her advice to other women? “Rather than saying, ‘You’re never too old to start,’ I’d say: ‘The older you are, or the weaker your bones, the more reason to start.’ Based on my experience, you can improve your bone density and lessen any osteoporosis you might have.” 

Janine Couchman is a personal trainer and fitness coach specialising in strength training women of all ages and stages. As well as private coaching, she delivers an eight-week group programme at Peak Fitness and Health. She can be found at janinecouchman.com and @JaninecouchmanPT