[As published in July/August 2026 BayBuzz magazine.]

Last month I found myself standing in front of two very different audiences. The first was a room full of accomplished women at a Pink Ribbon Breakfast. The second was a hall full of teenage girls and their mums at Iona College.

Different stages of life. Different experiences. Different challenges. But the message was surprisingly similar. The world needs more women who are willing to build things. Businesses. Communities. Opportunities. Solutions. And perhaps most importantly, lives that are designed intentionally rather than lived by default.

Nationally, women now make up around one-third of business owners in New Zealand. That’s a number that’s steadily growing, but there is still plenty of room for more of us. Fortunately, Hawke’s Bay has never struck me as a region that waits around for permission.

As I prepared this column, I asked a handful of local businesswomen what they’d learned through building businesses in our region. Their responses came from industries as varied as real estate, food rescue, insurance, aesthetics, coaching and marketing, but the themes were remarkably consistent.

Relationships matter

The first was relationships. When I asked about the biggest lessons they’d learned, the answers weren’t about marketing funnels, AI, strategic planning or seven-step frameworks. They were about people.

Nic Goodman from Mint Realty put it simply: “Relationships are key.” Anna Murphy, a Senior Life Insurance Adviser, echoed the sentiment, saying that in Hawke’s Bay, reputation is built through “trust, consistency and doing what you say you’ll do.” And Jarnah from Aesthetics Collective reminded me that people remember how you make them feel.

I think that’s one of the hidden advantages of doing business in Hawke’s Bay. You can’t hide behind a logo here. Your business eventually becomes an extension of your character. Which is slightly terrifying, but probably good for all of us.

Confidence isn’t a prerequisite

The second theme was confidence. Or more accurately, the lack of it. One woman admitted she still feels pressure to downplay her success because she doesn’t want to seem “too ambitious”. Another spoke about years working in a male-dominated industry where leadership roles seemed reserved for men. Others talked about questioning their pricing, doubting their expertise and wondering whether they were actually qualified to be sitting at the table. If that sounds familiar, congratulations. You’re probably a woman.

One of the most powerful responses came from Anna Murphy, who said: “Confidence doesn’t come from having all the answers. It comes from experience, preparation and backing yourself.”

I’ve found exactly the same thing building The Resistance. Nobody hands you confidence. You earn it through repetition. Through surviving things you were convinced you couldn’t.

Through doing the scary thing enough times that it eventually becomes just…Tuesday.

Find your people

Another recurring theme was community. The women I spoke to repeatedly talked about finding their tribe, building networks and surrounding themselves with people who understand what it’s like to build something from scratch.

Korrin from Life Unlimited stressed the importance of support networks. The team at Nourished for Nil highlighted the power of partnering with people whose strengths complement your own. And Belinda Williams from Bad Company offered one of my favourite observations: “Don’t take advice from people not in the ring.”

It’s funny because it’s true. Your friends and family love you. They’re wonderful. But sometimes the most useful advice comes from people who understand exactly what you’re trying to build because they’re building something too.

The business case for soft skills

The final theme surprised me. When I asked what women bring to business that doesn’t get talked about enough, I expected answers about resilience, work ethic or leadership. Those came up. But what came up even more often were qualities traditionally dismissed as ‘soft skills’.

Empathy. Compassion. Intuition. Relationship-building. Seeing the bigger picture.

Nic Goodman described women’s ability to understand not just the numbers, but also the people, emotions and pressure points that shape outcomes. Anna Murphy emphasised that empathy and trust-building aren’t soft skills at all – they’re commercially valuable business skills.

And several women highlighted something else that often goes unnoticed: the sheer amount women juggle behind the scenes. Businesses. Families. Children. Households. Community commitments. All while somehow remembering that it’s pyjama day tomorrow and somebody needs cupcakes by 8am.

Scissors, not cellotape

One quote in particular has stayed with me. Belinda said: “Great lives are built with scissors, not cellotape.” I’ve thought about that sentence a lot. So many of us spend years trying to tape extra things onto already overloaded lives. More commitments. More obligations. More expectations.

Perhaps building something meaningful isn’t about adding more. Perhaps it’s about being brave enough to cut away what no longer fits. To choose. To focus. To make space for the things that matter.

Business ownership has certainly taught me that lesson. As did speaking to these women. Because while their businesses are all different, they share something important. They saw a problem and decided to do something about it. They built something that didn’t exist before. A service. A solution. A community. An opportunity.

That’s the thing about strong women. They don’t just adapt to the world they’re given. They build a better one. 

Janine Couchman is a personal trainer and fitness coach specialising in strength training women of all ages and stages. She is founder of The Resistance in Havelock North – a gym designed specifically for women and shaped around real bodies, real lives, real challenges and real aspirations. She can be found at theresistance.co.nz